girls suck...but i already knew this

i don't know why i am being so stupid about this. a wedding is all about the love between two people and the role of their friends is to support and celebrate their union and nothing else! so why do i take it so personal when a certain close friend chooses not to include me in her wedding party? i think its less about being in the wedding and more about seeing where i rank in her life. especially since her "best friend", who has been horrible to her in the last few years as she often vents to me, has been chosen as a bridesmaid. i know it is so petty to feel this way but i can't help but feel like i have been deceived about the importance of our friendship.

part of why i think this hurts is because i had another friend who got married just last weekend. she had previously asked me to be one of her attendants. we were supposed to live together this year (while her husband returned to Iraq) but at the last moment she decided she wanted to live alone and pretty much dropped me with no notice or any other available options for my living situation. I did not receive a wedding invitation this summer and i didn't even know when the ceremony was until 3 days before it took place. and even then i heard it from other people. i see her at least once a week and she has yet to talk to me. i don't even know what shes upset about but obviuosly its enough to cut me out of her life. i hate girls! i don't know why i try so fucking hard.

seriously.